It’s hard enough to deal with insecurity when it comes to starting to talk to a girl when she’s alone, but when she’s with a partner or in a group of friends, getting close seems even more difficult.
If you have this difficulty – after all, who never, right? – we have some tips to help you.
But, first of all, you need to know that in some moments the approach just won’t happen or you’ll have to wait.
To understand the situation, analyze the mood of the group – without sounding like a maniac who listens to the conversation of others, of course. Are the girls chatting excitedly about something? Are you laughing, having fun?
If the answer is yes, it is easier to move on to the next steps; if the answer is no and they seem serious or you feel like they are talking about something sad or tense, take a step back and let it go.
So, let’s assume the weather is light for you to think about your approach.
It is worth remembering that a light and relaxed atmosphere is not synonymous with openness to flirting, nor is it a guarantee that the girls will want you to participate in the conversation, so prepare yourself for everything and don’t feel bad if they don’t want you to participate. of the chat.
In fact, knowing how to join a group and participate in the conversation is important in any area of your life. For example, if you’re alone at a work event and want to work on your networking, it’s critical to be able to talk to other people even when they’re closed in a group.
So, be aware that the next tips will not only be useful for your love life.
With that said, here we go:
Don’t just stand next to people just listening to what they’re talking about and waiting for a moment to join the conversation. In addition to being a boring attitude, this will make a bad impression and it is possible that girls will turn away from you.
Instead, approach the conversation confidently without, of course, being boring or scary. Don’t arrive at the circle of friends poking just one girl and isolating her from the group right away, arrive in a light and relaxed way.
A good idea is to approach the group asking the girls their opinion about something that is happening in the place where you are. For example: are you in a club? Excuse me, always in a light way, and ask everyone what they think of the party, if they usually go to the house and say that this is your first time there.
Then just continue the conversation saying the parties you like to go to and see how the rest of the dialogue goes.
The important thing is to be a nice person to the group, not just one of the girls.
If you’re with a friend, it’s even easier. Use the strategy of asking for the opinion in another way: arrive at the group of friends saying that, for example, your friend is arguing with you that he prefers Metallica and doesn’t like Iron Maiden.
Of course you have to change the approach according to where you are. The chances of you starting a conversation using these two bands is much lower if you are in a country club, so be aware, right?
Really join the conversation
How to approach a girl in a group of friends
There’s no point in joining the group and doing a monologue. Listen to what the girls have to say, participate in the conversation and give your opinion on the subjects without wanting to be the funniest of the ride or the smartest and most knowledgeable on the subject.
There are men who, to impress, want to talk more than other people and demonstrate that they know much more than they do on a certain subject. Don’t be that guy, show interest in what the girl is saying rather than seeming to know a lot more about the subject than she does.
Know when to start a side conversation
If, during the group chat, you are already exchanging glances with the girl who interests you, it is very likely that the approach will be natural and you will end up isolating yourself from the group without major problems.
But if the going gets tough, try to stand in front of the girl to exchange glances with her, or stand by her side asking a couple of questions so she knows you’re interested.
After a while, she’ll end up focusing more on you and what you have to say and you’ll end up creating a side conversation.
If this is taking a long time to happen and the other girls don’t move away so you can talk alone, don’t exclude them from the conversation. Of course, keep the focus on the girl you’re interested in, but don’t leave the other girls out. If you do, you can run the risk of being boring and they end up isolating you.
Know when to leave the conversation
Whenthe two-way conversation is difficult, say that, for example, you are going to get a drink or go somewhere else and be right back. Don’t break eye contact with the girl who wants to talk alone and see if she decides to follow you.
You can even directly ask, “I’m going to get a drink, does anyone want to join me?” without taking your eyes off her. If the answer is yes, that’s it. If the answer is no, smile and be nice and say you’ll see each other later.
This tactic can work and also conveys a greater lightness and naturalness. If, after a while, you don’t run into the group again or if the girl doesn’t come back to talk to you, walk up to her as you leave or wait to see if she leaves the club to ask for her phone number. .
Be honest and say you’d like to talk to her more, let her know that you really like her take on things and would like to see her again. Sincerity is always the best way.
Ask more, talk less
How to approach a girl in a group of friends
When you’re in the group, ask more questions and talk less. Everyone likes to feel interesting and to feel that their opinion matters. So ask about everything. When they are talking about the movie, care to know what they thought about a certain event; when they’re telling you something about their friendship, ask how long they’ve known each other.
During your questions, you’ll start to notice what you have in common with them or the girl you like, and then it will be easier to steer the conversation towards something you like or an area where you feel comfortable.
talk about yourself too
How to approach a girl in a group of friends
Listening and giving girls space to talk is key, but you should also slowly talk about yourself and make yourself interesting without, of course, being boring or arrogant.
After one of the girls says something about her and you feel like she has nothing more to add, say something about yourself that fits the conversation.
But be careful: when she’s talking about her, don’t interrupt her to say something about you. This is off-putting and sounds pretty arrogant.
Be you
Often, to appear confident, people end up lying about themselves or acting like someone else. Do not do this. If you manage to do well in the first few minutes of conversation, you will rarely be able to maintain the same behavior for long and it will be noticeable that you are changing your behavior to appear more interesting.
Besides, what’s the point of drawing attention by changing your personality? You won’t get noticed for who you are and that will become a problem over time – even if that time only lasts two hours.
When you become comfortable with who you are, confidence shines through and the lightness of conversation becomes irresistible.
For example, if you’re not naturally funny, don’t force your way into the group by making jokes. Choose your positive point and use that as a key part of the conversation.
Finally, don’t break the mood of the conversation. This goes for any situation: follow the flow and rhythm of the conversation without seeming too desperate for something to happen (by something, I mean: be with the girl you want). Show interest in the subjects and the rest, believe me, will flow naturally. Believe!